NYC Roomie and 1st day of class

I didn’t realize that I was going to be in NYC until Minnie took me to the airport. It suddenly hit right before I got out of the car. I didn’t realize that I was going to be living with a stranger in a studio apartment for a month until I got on the plane. Then, I started getting paranoid. I didn’t even know if it was going to be a dude or a chick! After a surprisingly peaceful cab ride, I checked in with security at the door and they informed me that my roommate Randy had already arrived. I was thinking to myself: “WTF? Randy? I’m living with a dude named Randy? Oh shit! “ They gave me my keys, and I got into the elevator. I took a deep breath before I stuck my key in the door, because I had no clue what to expect. Was someone going to be sitting in the corner, shooting heroin? Would I be walking in on gay butt sex? Jesus Christ, anything could be on the other side of that door!

My roommate was nowhere to be found, however the place looked nice. The bed was made, shoes under the bed, towels in the bathroom, TV hooked up – my roommate had made a cozy, homey little place out of our apartment. No complaints there. It was TOO homey and far too neat and clean. I thought to myself, “Damn, this Randy guy has gotta be gay!”

Then, I started to notice particular details. I looked over to Randy’s desk and see a Victoria’s Secret PINK mouse pad, there was a Vera Bradley bag out, along with a picture frame of a cute little blonde with her cute little boyfriend. My roommate Randy was actually a Randi! I was so glad that I was living with a chick!!!!

When she came back to the apartment and we got to chatting, there should have been the White Stripes, “We Are Gonna Be Friends” playing in the background. I am so lucky! She looks like Ellie Couch and reminds me of my little key sister Meg (who I miss!). She is a Jersey girl who works in marketing for ESPN, and we walk to the subway together in the mornings. She is a very good person, not abrasive or annoying, and all of her shit is pink too!! I cannot describe how relieved I was that she is 1. A female and 2. Normal. Thank God!
First days are very strange. The first day at work, school, summer camp is always chock full of hand shaking, introductions and small talk. You never know what to expect, who is showing up and from where these people you will be spending substantial amounts of time with are coming. Some people are nervous and awkward. My first day of classes at NYU was no different.

We had an orientation breakfast and did that bullshit “let’s go around and let everyone introduce themselves, talk about your background and where you are from.” It is bullshit because no one ever remembers names, AND it made me feel inadequate. Why? Well, I like to think that I am the shit, and extremely unique and awesome. This was totally shot-down when I walked into a room wtih at least 8 other tall, slim, stylish art historians. I guess they also got the idea that they could make a nice living persuading old rich horny white guys to invest in art. Fuck it….I feel like a drone!

Every chick was sizing every other chick up, based on 2 crucial criteria: shoes and bags. Lots of awkward, insincere compliments were passed back and forth, none of which generated any worthwhile conversation. I looked around the room, and while a good 1/3 of the class was my dress size, the rest of class represented more demographics than I can even count. After introductions I realized that I am among retired opera singers; art collectors and dealers; Harvard, Yale and Oxford grads; 3 lawyers; a dentist from Venezuela; museum professionals; employees of Christie’s and Sotheby’s; a Greek chick; 3 financial advisors; basically a room of really educated, well-traveled, experienced, professional people. I felt totally unimportant and unimpressive.

However, I certainly hold my own in class. I’m amazingly interested and couldn’t think of a more practical program for my career path. Yesterday morning we learned about markets and in the afternoon we learned about comparable market data. Super interesting stuff. I also learned some cool random facts. For example, each year there is 7-8 billion dollars STOLEN in fine art, and only 20% of it is recovered. Isn’t that crazy?!