I have about a trillion things to post, and as you can see I've been slacking. I just got back from Louisville, after spending time with three of my very best girlfriends. Playing in the Louisville Corporate Dodgeball tournement this morning, we made it to the third round, then got beat by a team who had no offense and a bunch of obese women. My competitive side came out, I did some yelling, and ended up with an ankle sprain. But many sweet moves went down, too. Well worth the sprain, in my book.
However, I'm getting ready to go to the gay bar to celebrate my friend's birthday, and I know I will have to dance my ass off. Even if I have a grapefruit for an ankle. I'm beat, so I've got to find some way to reenergize before this night begins...then find another way to wake up and be at an antique show at 7 AM...
thank god for adderall.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Birth control? Really?
This post is not entertaining or inspirational; it's more or less a personal health monologue. If you don't have a vagina you should care but probably don't. Why? Because if you don't have a vagina you probably don't ever have to ask yourself, "Should I take birth control?" It's a tough question to answer.
It doesn't seem like it should be: take a pill every day (or whatever ring, patch, etc) and you can fuck all the time without getting knocked up. In theory, it sounds fabulous! However, you are actually putting synthetic hormones in your body.
Hormones control everything about you: what you love, hate, feel, basically how you live. Do you really want to put synthetic hormones in your body?
Birth control (i.e. the pills, patch, ring, shot) can make your weight fluctuate. I don't know about you, but if I ever feel fat, I'm not having sex. These synthetic hormones also kill your libido.
So, taking birth control could potentially numb you from feeling and put you into a state of existence in an asexual world plus fifteen pounds. Doesn't sound like you get laid much there. I don't ever want to be in this place.
Furthermore, people can't be trusted. Even the best guys have slept with girls that I would never sleep with if I was gay or a dude. This just means you should use condoms anyway. Who knows what's goin' around...
Aside from condoms (monogamous relationship) pull-out method is more effective than condoms when done properly. If you know when you're ovulating, and you use condoms during the 10 days around ovulation, and he pulls out the rest of the time, this is more reliable than birth control pills. Real talk.
Plus, who wants to take a pill every day? And really, will you remember to take it at the same time every day? I worked with two women, who are now two mommies, because they flaked out and forgot to take their birth control pills at the right time. Slip up once or twice in a month and you're ovulating then BAM! You're prego. I don't trust myself, nor do I want to, take a pill every single day. I'm not even getting laid right now! Take your pills elsewhere, Doc.
Yet another thing that men never have to stress about.
It doesn't seem like it should be: take a pill every day (or whatever ring, patch, etc) and you can fuck all the time without getting knocked up. In theory, it sounds fabulous! However, you are actually putting synthetic hormones in your body.
Hormones control everything about you: what you love, hate, feel, basically how you live. Do you really want to put synthetic hormones in your body?
Birth control (i.e. the pills, patch, ring, shot) can make your weight fluctuate. I don't know about you, but if I ever feel fat, I'm not having sex. These synthetic hormones also kill your libido.
So, taking birth control could potentially numb you from feeling and put you into a state of existence in an asexual world plus fifteen pounds. Doesn't sound like you get laid much there. I don't ever want to be in this place.
Furthermore, people can't be trusted. Even the best guys have slept with girls that I would never sleep with if I was gay or a dude. This just means you should use condoms anyway. Who knows what's goin' around...
Aside from condoms (monogamous relationship) pull-out method is more effective than condoms when done properly. If you know when you're ovulating, and you use condoms during the 10 days around ovulation, and he pulls out the rest of the time, this is more reliable than birth control pills. Real talk.
Plus, who wants to take a pill every day? And really, will you remember to take it at the same time every day? I worked with two women, who are now two mommies, because they flaked out and forgot to take their birth control pills at the right time. Slip up once or twice in a month and you're ovulating then BAM! You're prego. I don't trust myself, nor do I want to, take a pill every single day. I'm not even getting laid right now! Take your pills elsewhere, Doc.
Yet another thing that men never have to stress about.
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
The little brother is all grown up now
Please listen to my buddy on myspace. His new song "Space Ducks" is quite hilarious.
Speaking of hilarious, if you haven't checked out his video watch it now:
Looks just like his sister.
Speaking of hilarious, if you haven't checked out his video watch it now:
Looks just like his sister.
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Purses: fucking disgraceful
I am embarrassed for myself. In an effort to clean out my closet, I started to organize my handbag collection. I am ashamed at the wasteful amount of crap I own. I don't consider myself to be materialistic, nor a shop-a-holic, nor a purse fanatic. However, after my purse count I am truly disappointed in myself. Altogether I have 32 purses. Yuck. No more until I get rid of some.
What's worse, I'm definitely a pattern shopper. Half of them fuckin' look the same!!! Ew! Bad girl.
Friday, July 31, 2009
Calories in Alcoholic Drinks
Ewww... this grosses me out to think about how many calories I've put in my body in single evenings. Looks like I will be sticking with Mich Ultra (a freshmen year favorite) or rum and diet. This came from WebMD:
Pina Colada (6 oz): 378 calories
Mojito (8 oz): 214 calories
Cosmopolitan (4 oz): 200 calories
Chocolate martini: (2 oz each vodka, chocolate liqueur, cream, 1/2 oz creme de cacao, chocolate syrup): 438
Margarita (8 oz): 280
Green apple martini (1 oz each vodka, sour apple, apple juice): 148
Martini (2.5 oz): 160
Port wine (3 oz):128
Bloody Mary (5 oz): 118
Red wine (5 oz):120
White wine (5 oz): 120
Alcohol-free wine (5 oz): 20-30
Beer (12 oz): 150-198
Light beer (12 oz): 95-136
Ultra-light beer (12 oz): 64-95
Champagne (5oz): 106-120
Coffee liqueur (3 ounces): 348
Godiva chocolate liqueur (3 oz): 310
Wine spritzer (5 oz): 100
Eggnog with rum (8 ounces): 370
Hot chocolate with peppermint schnapps (8 oz): 380
Hot buttered rum (8 oz): 292
Spiced cider with rum ( 8 oz):150
Mulled wine (5 oz): 200
Vodka and tonic (8 oz): 200
Screwdriver (8 oz): 190
Mimosa (4 oz): 75
Gin and tonic (7 oz): 200
Long Island iced tea (8 oz): 780
White Russian (2 oz vodka, 1.5 oz coffee liqueur, 1.5 oz cream): 425
Mai Tai (6 oz) (1.5 oz rum, 1/2 oz cream de along, 1/2 oz triple sec, sour mix, pineapple juice): 350
Rum and Coke (8 oz): 185
Rum and Diet Coke (8 oz): 100
Mike's Hard Lemonade (11 oz): 98
Pina Colada (6 oz): 378 calories
Mojito (8 oz): 214 calories
Cosmopolitan (4 oz): 200 calories
Chocolate martini: (2 oz each vodka, chocolate liqueur, cream, 1/2 oz creme de cacao, chocolate syrup): 438
Margarita (8 oz): 280
Green apple martini (1 oz each vodka, sour apple, apple juice): 148
Martini (2.5 oz): 160
Port wine (3 oz):128
Bloody Mary (5 oz): 118
Red wine (5 oz):120
White wine (5 oz): 120
Alcohol-free wine (5 oz): 20-30
Beer (12 oz): 150-198
Light beer (12 oz): 95-136
Ultra-light beer (12 oz): 64-95
Champagne (5oz): 106-120
Coffee liqueur (3 ounces): 348
Godiva chocolate liqueur (3 oz): 310
Wine spritzer (5 oz): 100
Eggnog with rum (8 ounces): 370
Hot chocolate with peppermint schnapps (8 oz): 380
Hot buttered rum (8 oz): 292
Spiced cider with rum ( 8 oz):150
Mulled wine (5 oz): 200
Vodka and tonic (8 oz): 200
Screwdriver (8 oz): 190
Mimosa (4 oz): 75
Gin and tonic (7 oz): 200
Long Island iced tea (8 oz): 780
White Russian (2 oz vodka, 1.5 oz coffee liqueur, 1.5 oz cream): 425
Mai Tai (6 oz) (1.5 oz rum, 1/2 oz cream de along, 1/2 oz triple sec, sour mix, pineapple juice): 350
Rum and Coke (8 oz): 185
Rum and Diet Coke (8 oz): 100
Mike's Hard Lemonade (11 oz): 98
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Django Reinhardt
A friend from undergrad reminded me of how happy this can make you. I'm ready to go swing dancing now.
Monday, July 27, 2009
World's most charming man falls in love with chick far hotter than me
Have you ever avoided thinking about someone, until you're forced by changes in one of your lives? Then, you realize you cared far more than you ever thought you did, and a person you haven't seen or spoken to in months becomes the focal point of your reflective and emotional energy.
Peyton Clarkson. Comedian I dated for a short period of time while I was in New York last summer.
What made me remember him? This time, I stumbled across one of his stand-up routines while sifting through Zach Galafinakis skits on youtube.
What do I remember about him? Great conversations. Insightful, funny, so positive: ultimately a dreamer.
We met when me and a couple of my girlfriends randomly walked into this comedy club, The Village Lantern (where George Carlin and several other legends got their start...off Bleeker Street) after we got denied at Off the Wagon because of the frenchies' passports. We went into the Village Lantern to watch comedy and sat in the front row. Peyton was performing.
In the middle of his routine, he calls us out as part of his routine and asks us where we're from. Of course he had typical comedian responses, like speaking really bad french to the french chicks. When I replied "Kentucky," he completely flattered me, obviously not without commenting on my accent. On stage, he invited us to stay after and drink with him, calling us "the hott chicks" for the remainder of the show. We didn't stop talking until I had to go to class the next day.
The most memorable dance of my life. Some of the most memorable conversations of my life. I can remember every kind thing he ever said to me (and he said many). Whenever we hung out, I had a great time. We always did cool things, too. Never had sex, but definitely got stoned in his bed while he did hilarious voices and impersonations (please get high with a comic before you die). He's just one of those people you're really glad you met in life.
At any rate, he is now completely in love with his current girlfriend who is a pin-up dancer in Hollywood who looks like Audrey Hepburn. Total babe. They're really cute.
While I certainly wish I could have experiences like that again, and cool guys getting hot girlfriends is always kinda disappointing, I can't say I'm not happy for the guy. Maybe if I had spent more time with him I would be jealous? We've not seen each other in almost a year now, and only talked a handful of times since. I don't think I was ever sexually attracted to him, although it did seem romantic. The dynamic is confusing. But what I find most interesting about the experience, that's obviously affected me to some extent at least, is the way I've framed my thoughts about him.
I don't mean to strip anyone of their identity (and I hope this makes sense) but in my mind I don't think of Peyton, I think of "Peyton". That is, "Peyton" as a (Jungian) archetype, rather than a specific individual. A "Peyton" is one who induces laughter, excitement, intellectual stimulation, and overall euphoria. A Peyton the manifestation of positive, engaging experiences with members of the opposite sex. An association I make.
Peytons are truly few and far between.
I feel so weird about thinking of this person like this. I'm really thinking about the experiences I had with him, rather than him as a person. I don't know if that's an insult or a compliment, but I mean it only as a good thing. I guess I feel strange thinking of someone else in terms of my own encounters, rather than their "person-ness." That's pretty selfish, isn't it?
I've felt very "absorptive" lately. More on this in forthcoming post.
Peyton Clarkson. Comedian I dated for a short period of time while I was in New York last summer.
What made me remember him? This time, I stumbled across one of his stand-up routines while sifting through Zach Galafinakis skits on youtube.
What do I remember about him? Great conversations. Insightful, funny, so positive: ultimately a dreamer.
We met when me and a couple of my girlfriends randomly walked into this comedy club, The Village Lantern (where George Carlin and several other legends got their start...off Bleeker Street) after we got denied at Off the Wagon because of the frenchies' passports. We went into the Village Lantern to watch comedy and sat in the front row. Peyton was performing.
In the middle of his routine, he calls us out as part of his routine and asks us where we're from. Of course he had typical comedian responses, like speaking really bad french to the french chicks. When I replied "Kentucky," he completely flattered me, obviously not without commenting on my accent. On stage, he invited us to stay after and drink with him, calling us "the hott chicks" for the remainder of the show. We didn't stop talking until I had to go to class the next day.
The most memorable dance of my life. Some of the most memorable conversations of my life. I can remember every kind thing he ever said to me (and he said many). Whenever we hung out, I had a great time. We always did cool things, too. Never had sex, but definitely got stoned in his bed while he did hilarious voices and impersonations (please get high with a comic before you die). He's just one of those people you're really glad you met in life.
At any rate, he is now completely in love with his current girlfriend who is a pin-up dancer in Hollywood who looks like Audrey Hepburn. Total babe. They're really cute.
While I certainly wish I could have experiences like that again, and cool guys getting hot girlfriends is always kinda disappointing, I can't say I'm not happy for the guy. Maybe if I had spent more time with him I would be jealous? We've not seen each other in almost a year now, and only talked a handful of times since. I don't think I was ever sexually attracted to him, although it did seem romantic. The dynamic is confusing. But what I find most interesting about the experience, that's obviously affected me to some extent at least, is the way I've framed my thoughts about him.
I don't mean to strip anyone of their identity (and I hope this makes sense) but in my mind I don't think of Peyton, I think of "Peyton". That is, "Peyton" as a (Jungian) archetype, rather than a specific individual. A "Peyton" is one who induces laughter, excitement, intellectual stimulation, and overall euphoria. A Peyton the manifestation of positive, engaging experiences with members of the opposite sex. An association I make.
Peytons are truly few and far between.
I feel so weird about thinking of this person like this. I'm really thinking about the experiences I had with him, rather than him as a person. I don't know if that's an insult or a compliment, but I mean it only as a good thing. I guess I feel strange thinking of someone else in terms of my own encounters, rather than their "person-ness." That's pretty selfish, isn't it?
I've felt very "absorptive" lately. More on this in forthcoming post.
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Are Academics Ever Happy?
Just a question I've been asking myself for a while. One of my (Perhaps MOST) favorite professors just wrote me a book of an email to me about how disenchanted he is with his life in academia. He is certainly not the first.
Another great professor of mine in grad school (an archaeologist...the one I had a HUGE crush on) can hardly have a family because of everything he's expected to do. My other professors are always stressed out about something, having relationship issues, and NEVER have sex with their partners. It's not like the pay makes up for it, either.
So they all complain to their students about how wretched their lives are, how much political shit they have to deal with, the increasing size of their work loads, and budget cuts. They never can separate their work from their personal life, so insecurities and validation issues in their romantic relationships abound. You can imagine how difficult having a relationship with an academic would be.
I feel sorry for my professors. They're wonderful, brilliant people, and I love them. I want contentment for them so badly that it hurts my soul. However, it doesn't seem to be too prevalent among academics.
I used to think this was my path. A Ph.D. is super-impressive and the allure of being a specialist used to be my motivation for go further in my studies. However, more and more people are getting these degrees now, so they're not just reserved for the elite. No perks in particular come to mind, so I don't understand where the benefit in choosing this path would be. There comes a point when "doing what you love" becomes just "doing." That's when you exist, instead of living. I would kill myself before my life ever came to this. From what I'm told, this happens a lot to academics, which makes me so sad.
After getting closer with my professors and realizing what an emotionally unhealthy lifestyle they have, I'm very glad that I'm where I am now. Happy, healthy, in love with life. 'Baller', rather than 'Doctor', you could say.
Another great professor of mine in grad school (an archaeologist...the one I had a HUGE crush on) can hardly have a family because of everything he's expected to do. My other professors are always stressed out about something, having relationship issues, and NEVER have sex with their partners. It's not like the pay makes up for it, either.
So they all complain to their students about how wretched their lives are, how much political shit they have to deal with, the increasing size of their work loads, and budget cuts. They never can separate their work from their personal life, so insecurities and validation issues in their romantic relationships abound. You can imagine how difficult having a relationship with an academic would be.
I feel sorry for my professors. They're wonderful, brilliant people, and I love them. I want contentment for them so badly that it hurts my soul. However, it doesn't seem to be too prevalent among academics.
I used to think this was my path. A Ph.D. is super-impressive and the allure of being a specialist used to be my motivation for go further in my studies. However, more and more people are getting these degrees now, so they're not just reserved for the elite. No perks in particular come to mind, so I don't understand where the benefit in choosing this path would be. There comes a point when "doing what you love" becomes just "doing." That's when you exist, instead of living. I would kill myself before my life ever came to this. From what I'm told, this happens a lot to academics, which makes me so sad.
After getting closer with my professors and realizing what an emotionally unhealthy lifestyle they have, I'm very glad that I'm where I am now. Happy, healthy, in love with life. 'Baller', rather than 'Doctor', you could say.
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Let's Play a Game!
Question: Which mega-nerd (from my philosophy club) in the accompanying photograph asked me on a date via facebook? email, sil vous plait.
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Sigur Ros is inspiring
Sigur Ros is an Icelandic Ambient Pop-rock band that I've been listening to again recently, mostly their late 90s stuff. They've got a new album coming out in 2010, another thing I have to look forward to, besides Johnny Depp + Lewis Carroll. I have a feeling that 2010 is gonna be a seriously awesome year!
Sigur Ros means "Victory Rose" in English.
A translation of the "Saeglopur" lyrics:
A lost seafarer, alive
has returned home
A lost seafarer, alive
has returned home
a diver comes
has returned home
a diver comes
has returned home
Really sensual. I think this song is exquisite. Watch the video and listen here.
Sigur Ros means "Victory Rose" in English.
A translation of the "Saeglopur" lyrics:
A lost seafarer, alive
has returned home
A lost seafarer, alive
has returned home
a diver comes
has returned home
a diver comes
has returned home
Really sensual. I think this song is exquisite. Watch the video and listen here.
Dzine
One of my first gigs as a new small business owner (which is, by the way, awesome) is appraising some works by this artist from Chicago Dzine. His website has sweet free desktop wallpaper downloads of his colorful, kalidoscopic, psychedelic "Dzines". Hook yo' self up!
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
The Darkest Sketch in History
In celebration of one of my favorite shows of all-time, Robot Chicken, being nominated for an Emmy! I'm glad someone appreciates true art...
Monday, July 20, 2009
Window-licker turned prodigy: M.C. Escher
Fun fact: M.C. Escher failed 2nd grade and attended a "special" (think more short-bus and less Beethoven) school.
Few works in color (like this one) have been made popular. Brilliant.
Ghetto Baskets: a lovely gift idea
DangerDave posted on "GhettoBaskets" yesterday and I think it's hysterical.
You know what to get me come November 17th!
You know what to get me come November 17th!
My dream date, Zach Galifianakis, continues to be one of the most hilarious men in the world
A while back, Zach Galifianakis had a short-lived show on VH1 called Late Night with Zach. It wasn't a hit (like Hangover) so it got cancelled. This was one of the episodes Zach made after he found out the show was on its last leg, as he targets a much younger audience: preschoolers.
"No more chicken jokes, we've had enough of those...Does anybody have a joke about Creed?"
I shamelessly laughed at the laughter of these children prompted by words such as "boogers" and "pooped". They love him! I love him.
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Another astrology kick
So the psychic experience got me on another one of my astrology kicks, part of which is posted below. I still find them to be about 70% feasible. This is from Astrology.com (type in your birthday and you get date-specific readings):
MERCURY IN SAGITTARIUS--Mercury in the signs gives clues to the kinds of concerns that occupy your mind, and reveals your psychological approach to making decisions and conveying your ideas to others. In this sign, it influences your mind to focus on attitudes behind the facts. This kind of approach can give you great insight into social motivation and its subsequent events. You will be much concerned with education, especially in the fields of religion, philosophy, and law. You are direct in speech and will say exactly what you think. Since your ideas are likely to be near the traditional, you will be respected for your directness. You need to keep aware that facts are not always attitudes, and not confuse the two or ignore the facts. Find out more with your full-length reading...
VENUS IN CAPRICORN--Venus in the signs indicates how you express your emotions in personal relationships, and your attitude toward money, personal possessions, creature comforts, and social and aesthetic values. In Capricorn it bestows a sensual, sexual expression, but the relationships are likely to be serious and mature. In the other areas, it inclines your interest toward business, commerce, banking, investments, stocks, shares, professional sports, and executive positions which bring you contact with many people. You are likely to have a strong sense of composition in art forms with an attraction to classical music and the traditional art which survives the times. You could be very successful in businesses related to the arts, such as professional sports. Find out more with your full-length reading...
I didn't find out more with a full-length reading, after paying a psychic $20 just a couple days ago and getting made fun of ever since then.
MERCURY IN SAGITTARIUS--Mercury in the signs gives clues to the kinds of concerns that occupy your mind, and reveals your psychological approach to making decisions and conveying your ideas to others. In this sign, it influences your mind to focus on attitudes behind the facts. This kind of approach can give you great insight into social motivation and its subsequent events. You will be much concerned with education, especially in the fields of religion, philosophy, and law. You are direct in speech and will say exactly what you think. Since your ideas are likely to be near the traditional, you will be respected for your directness. You need to keep aware that facts are not always attitudes, and not confuse the two or ignore the facts. Find out more with your full-length reading...
VENUS IN CAPRICORN--Venus in the signs indicates how you express your emotions in personal relationships, and your attitude toward money, personal possessions, creature comforts, and social and aesthetic values. In Capricorn it bestows a sensual, sexual expression, but the relationships are likely to be serious and mature. In the other areas, it inclines your interest toward business, commerce, banking, investments, stocks, shares, professional sports, and executive positions which bring you contact with many people. You are likely to have a strong sense of composition in art forms with an attraction to classical music and the traditional art which survives the times. You could be very successful in businesses related to the arts, such as professional sports. Find out more with your full-length reading...
I didn't find out more with a full-length reading, after paying a psychic $20 just a couple days ago and getting made fun of ever since then.
Friday, July 17, 2009
High-kick loser ranks among Cosmo's Sexiest Shirtless Men
An NYC friend pointed this out to me: I beat this guy in a high kick contest in Manhattan. He's number 30 on the Cosmo site. Small world, eh?
The fact that he looks alright with his shirt off doesn't make up for his lackluster high-kicking skills (and personality).
Psychic Reading
I definitely paid $20 for a psychic reading last night, after being convinced by many friends who had done it before that this woman was really on target. People like myself, who actually believe in mystical things like spirits, et al, should not do this. All it ever amounts to is stress and paranoia.
For fifteen minutes, I sat with the psychic as she did my numerology and read my cards. Skeptical, I was very reserved and brief with my responses to her questions, so I wasn't giving her too much information. Nor did I respond to her with body language. I felt that my reactions to her were very neutral. At any rate, this is what she told me:
"Do you ever wonder why you never meet a stranger? You are an old soul. You have been on this earth for a long, long time." At this point, she explained that this life I was rebuilding my karma (I infer from this that in my past life I wasn't doing very good things?) so, she said, I am now giving whatever I can to those around me.
She went on to talk about my health. She asked me if I had endometriosis or bad periods. The latter is true, so I told her that I did have bad periods. She told me that I needed to have a check-up before trying to conceive.
Then, she shifted the direction of the reading toward marriage. She straight up told me that I was supposed to have married already, but she saw that my last serious relationship had failed and that I was still healing from this experience. (At this point I started really believing her, as I told her no information about any of this. She didn't even know if I was single, straight, any of it.) She went on to tell me about current romantic interests, which was very entertaining.
The psychic told me that I had met my current romantic interest in a life before this one, so it might seem as if we knew each other on a different level. (I'm not sure what this means, and she probably isn't either) She said he will fall in love with me, but I would have to be the one to open up about how I felt. I found this to be endearing, so I broke down and told her his birthday. Yes, she did his numerology....and yes I am this lame. She tells me that he is a perfectionist, and I am going to have to help him let go of some of the stress associated with this attribute. Also, she said he will only get married once, and that I am attracted to him because of his mind.
This is funny: She said that I have a male friend who is romantically interested but will never speak a word of it to me. (I have a lot of male friends, and just to be honest, I don't know what constitutes this woman's idea of romantic interest, but I guarantee that at least one of them has wondered at least once, "What would it be like to...Morgan?" just because that's a dude-type thought to have. Again, this was an entertaining experience.
At this point, she read my cards and immediately asked if I was pregnant. I told her no, and she tells me to use contraception because my cards showed a pregnancy within the next year. This really bothered me for a couple reasons. 1. Some of the first information she gave me was about making sure I had my ducks in a row for conceiving children. If she has any kind of gift and if any of this has merit, then that freaks me out because infertility is probably one of my top 3 fears EVER. 2. That information is almost negated by this piece of information. Problems conceiving and unexpected pregnancy? Hmmm... 3. Any 24 year old female at a healthy weight has a body that is dying to make babies. We're programmed to do this, and I'm at a ripe age. That does not require supernatural intuition to deduce. This part kinda bummed me out about the reading, and almost discredited the other things she told me that I really wanted to believe.
I asked her about my career, and she did know, without me mentioning it at all, that I had started my own business. She told me that I would need another job for the next 6 months before I got enough business to sustain myself. Eventually, she said, I would add two business partners, both male, because of their connections. She said I will be successful and not have to worry about money (which 2 other psychics have told me in the past, so that's cool). Like the two psychics who've read my cards in the past, I have no divorce in my future and I will have two children (except the guy in Paris told me I would have three children).
I asked her about my grandfathers' health, and my dad as well. She said that my grandfather closest to me would pass first, and that my mum would outlive my father. If the latter is true, I can only imagine how annoying that will be. Mum will drive me crazy as an elderly widow, I cannot even begin to tell you how much I'm not looking forward to this potential scenario...
All in all, it was entertaining. However, the idea of being prego really killed my buzz, and I'm either running off to convent, or living in a giant condom by myself for the next year. What a shame...
For fifteen minutes, I sat with the psychic as she did my numerology and read my cards. Skeptical, I was very reserved and brief with my responses to her questions, so I wasn't giving her too much information. Nor did I respond to her with body language. I felt that my reactions to her were very neutral. At any rate, this is what she told me:
"Do you ever wonder why you never meet a stranger? You are an old soul. You have been on this earth for a long, long time." At this point, she explained that this life I was rebuilding my karma (I infer from this that in my past life I wasn't doing very good things?) so, she said, I am now giving whatever I can to those around me.
She went on to talk about my health. She asked me if I had endometriosis or bad periods. The latter is true, so I told her that I did have bad periods. She told me that I needed to have a check-up before trying to conceive.
Then, she shifted the direction of the reading toward marriage. She straight up told me that I was supposed to have married already, but she saw that my last serious relationship had failed and that I was still healing from this experience. (At this point I started really believing her, as I told her no information about any of this. She didn't even know if I was single, straight, any of it.) She went on to tell me about current romantic interests, which was very entertaining.
The psychic told me that I had met my current romantic interest in a life before this one, so it might seem as if we knew each other on a different level. (I'm not sure what this means, and she probably isn't either) She said he will fall in love with me, but I would have to be the one to open up about how I felt. I found this to be endearing, so I broke down and told her his birthday. Yes, she did his numerology....and yes I am this lame. She tells me that he is a perfectionist, and I am going to have to help him let go of some of the stress associated with this attribute. Also, she said he will only get married once, and that I am attracted to him because of his mind.
This is funny: She said that I have a male friend who is romantically interested but will never speak a word of it to me. (I have a lot of male friends, and just to be honest, I don't know what constitutes this woman's idea of romantic interest, but I guarantee that at least one of them has wondered at least once, "What would it be like to...Morgan?" just because that's a dude-type thought to have. Again, this was an entertaining experience.
At this point, she read my cards and immediately asked if I was pregnant. I told her no, and she tells me to use contraception because my cards showed a pregnancy within the next year. This really bothered me for a couple reasons. 1. Some of the first information she gave me was about making sure I had my ducks in a row for conceiving children. If she has any kind of gift and if any of this has merit, then that freaks me out because infertility is probably one of my top 3 fears EVER. 2. That information is almost negated by this piece of information. Problems conceiving and unexpected pregnancy? Hmmm... 3. Any 24 year old female at a healthy weight has a body that is dying to make babies. We're programmed to do this, and I'm at a ripe age. That does not require supernatural intuition to deduce. This part kinda bummed me out about the reading, and almost discredited the other things she told me that I really wanted to believe.
I asked her about my career, and she did know, without me mentioning it at all, that I had started my own business. She told me that I would need another job for the next 6 months before I got enough business to sustain myself. Eventually, she said, I would add two business partners, both male, because of their connections. She said I will be successful and not have to worry about money (which 2 other psychics have told me in the past, so that's cool). Like the two psychics who've read my cards in the past, I have no divorce in my future and I will have two children (except the guy in Paris told me I would have three children).
I asked her about my grandfathers' health, and my dad as well. She said that my grandfather closest to me would pass first, and that my mum would outlive my father. If the latter is true, I can only imagine how annoying that will be. Mum will drive me crazy as an elderly widow, I cannot even begin to tell you how much I'm not looking forward to this potential scenario...
All in all, it was entertaining. However, the idea of being prego really killed my buzz, and I'm either running off to convent, or living in a giant condom by myself for the next year. What a shame...
Thursday, July 16, 2009
legalization ad in Cali: smokers want to pay taxes!
In a very small way, I helped get funding for this ad (calling and writing), so I'm pretty hyped it's getting national attention and people are listening to pot smokers. I actually feel like this movement is making progress and people are talking, which is really refreshing.
Truthfully, smokers DO want to pay taxes! I buy weed every week, but I would prefer it to be safe and regulated any day than the way it is now.
Moving in the right direction-cheers and beers! one love.
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Wareheim + MGMT and other vids he's directed
Get back jack, Eric Wareheim just directed MGMT's video for "Youth". Eric, from Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job!
They had to have gotten those sweet 'fits from American Apparel.
Apparently he directing music vids now?! Has been since last fall...I had no clue until today. Check out his video for Tommy Sparks it has some crazy female body builder.
And, the hilarious video he did for Phantom Planet:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wAk59Y1KGU
["Is that hair from your bikini region?"]
As well as the one he did for Ben Folds (and Regina Spektor). Genius.
They're all very 80s, think space arcade games with lasers. Bowie-esque.
They had to have gotten those sweet 'fits from American Apparel.
Apparently he directing music vids now?! Has been since last fall...I had no clue until today. Check out his video for Tommy Sparks it has some crazy female body builder.
And, the hilarious video he did for Phantom Planet:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wAk59Y1KGU
["Is that hair from your bikini region?"]
As well as the one he did for Ben Folds (and Regina Spektor). Genius.
They're all very 80s, think space arcade games with lasers. Bowie-esque.
Obaid Karki on Palin and Coulter
My favorite libertarian arab political commentator, Obaid Karki, calls Ann Coulter his "queen." Among other hilarious things he says, and of course, Ron Paul plugs. Then, he quotes Marx.
The intro alone cracks me up, without even hearing him say anything... he has now incorporated an MJ motif into his video blogs. I love this guy.
The intro alone cracks me up, without even hearing him say anything... he has now incorporated an MJ motif into his video blogs. I love this guy.
Taco Bell Folk Song
These guys are too cute. Watch to the end to see the most baller drive-thru worker repeat their order.
When I roll up to the drive-thru I never encounter anyone this attentive or clever! They're usually high, angsty, or just plain lazy...but typically if I'm eating crappy fast food I am too!
When I roll up to the drive-thru I never encounter anyone this attentive or clever! They're usually high, angsty, or just plain lazy...but typically if I'm eating crappy fast food I am too!
at it again...not me this time
Had to share (with permission) an except from a friend's email:
quick catch-up: after a nutso front-row appearance at the Horsemen game last night, complete with clanging cowbells, we went to Saddly Ridge or Cadillac Ranch and Mandy and I made out to get free drinks. Then we went to Waffle House where I watched her puke and sleep in the booth, while I enjoyed a caeser with fucking chicken fingers on top for FREE. I even got to keep the bowl, because we got kicked out before I was finished. Then this morning I smoked a joint on my porch while listening to killer tunes and now I'm cleaning my apartment while watching that crazy Michael Jackson interview where he shows you around Neverland and stuff. Also: Kool-Aid squeezits are being consumed.
As you can see, we live the dream. Still.
Excellent work! Aren't nights like this a blast?!
quick catch-up: after a nutso front-row appearance at the Horsemen game last night, complete with clanging cowbells, we went to Saddly Ridge or Cadillac Ranch and Mandy and I made out to get free drinks. Then we went to Waffle House where I watched her puke and sleep in the booth, while I enjoyed a caeser with fucking chicken fingers on top for FREE. I even got to keep the bowl, because we got kicked out before I was finished. Then this morning I smoked a joint on my porch while listening to killer tunes and now I'm cleaning my apartment while watching that crazy Michael Jackson interview where he shows you around Neverland and stuff. Also: Kool-Aid squeezits are being consumed.
As you can see, we live the dream. Still.
Excellent work! Aren't nights like this a blast?!
The Game diss to Jay-Z
"I'm so Wavy" is The Game's diss to Jay-Z. 3:17 is where the real talk begins.
This weekend, I claimed that (despite my reservations about making ANY judgments on new rap music) The Game was one of the most talented new rappers. Mikey scoffed, then said, "Yeah well a lot of people say that." We shared words, then didn't speak for a few minutes.
His favorite rapper of all-time is Nate Dogg. But I guess he is the only devout Nate Dogg fan in the world. He is also a Jay-Z fan. Hence, this post.
When I get my rap career off the ground, I will certainly challenge him to a battle. I think I know who will win.
touch happiness
Walk and touch peace every moment.
Walk and touch happiness every moment.
Each step brings a fresh breeze.
Each step makes a flower bloom.
Kiss the Earth with your feet.
Bring the Earth your love and happiness.
The Earth will be safe
when we feel safe in ourselves.
hangover remedies
Things that can potentially make hangovers much better:
pot
coca-cola
ferret kisses
activity (not cardio, that's like some fucked up sort of medieval torture. rock climbing works well, anything strength)
gummy berry juice
waffle house
cracker barrel
laying by the pool
showers
adderall
spice: not like oregano, like the kind harvested from sandworms in Dune. It can do everything.
ain't nothin' change hold down G's up: clubs are stupid.
After a big day on the lake, that followed a late night/early morning for me in Clifton (whole other story...), we managed to kill a few bottles of wine at my place while we cooked out and got ready to go drinking in the city. When females get together with wine, we all suddenly turn into winos, and its awesome. seriously. you don't know what you're missing.
We hit the Pavillion at Mt. Adams, where we proceeded to take shots. Tequila (my idea...not the best I've ever had), red headed sluts, petron, one after another. Rounds and rounds were consumed. I was already dehydrated. For whatever reason, I was also just in the mood to be a bitch. I'm pretty sure its the dance club atmosphere. I was fine when we were sitting outside, making fun of people, doing impressions, telling stories...it was when we entered a crowded room of double-douches that I became really bitchy.
First off, I hope I never ever meet a love interest in a dance club. I don't have the personality for it. Bars are way better for actual socialization if you're going out for that. Stupid clubs: you bounce around, (some people) try to look hot (?), can't hear anything and yell the entire time. It's stressful, really. The same drunk girl dug her 4 inch stripper heels into my foot several times, and I was about 5 seconds away from really going off. If we hadn't been swarmed by short guys (we're talking 5'6"ish...not even my height. they looked 16) then I would have been very unladylike in my confrontation with her.
If you really want to have fun at a dance club, just dance with other chicks (or rap to Lil Troy with Mikey in a room full of black people). Most men have no rhythm. They want to put their dirty hands on your body. Girls don't do this. In groups, we make up silly dances and laugh and have a far better time. However, when women do this, it only draws more d-bags near. When this happens, I have identified a number of escape routes to take:
The bathroom (a classic...but somehow the megacreeps know to wait for you, so you actually have to hide or plan a new route to your destination)
The focused groove (ignore the guy completely and focus intensely on anything but the guy who is trying to dance with you; usually this is a good girl-friend who you were trying to dance with in the first place)
The gratitude (dance for only a minute, then stop completely, smile, and say "Thanks!" then give a little wave and walk off. Saying "thank you" confirms the finality of the situation)
Club social dynamic is hysterically retarded. Like a middle school dance, a guy will walk up to a chick, introduce himself within a couple songs, and say nothing thereafter. This somehow gives him the right to rub his boner on whoever. As I mentioned before, I was kinda put-out by the atmosphere and all the losers trying to dance with us (a good size group of women always get creepo attention) so I didn't afford anyone the courtesy of even a passive cop-out listed above.
A guy came up to me, started dancing and said, "Hey, My name's David."
My response:
"Hey. I don't care." I turned around completely. Getting out of my personal space was the only way this guy was going to improve my night. I wanted to be with my friends! Mikey is usually the douche deterrent, since most of the time people assume he's my boyfriend. However, he was spitting game and had no time to play watchdog.
So I ended up doing some dancing. I did do half a song's worth of African dancing with a French-African named Jean-Roucher. I learned a step or 5 at the dance clubs when I was in France, and he was shocked that a white girl in the midwest had any clue. Also, as usual, I managed to practice my french during the early morning hours. Usually, I only speak french with my cab driver Mohammed, so it was actually cool to have a conversation with a different dialect. It was short though since the music was far too loud for talking.
Even though there were megadouches everywhere and some drunk girl made me mad for a minute, we still had a blast. After the bars closed, we all stayed at my place, smoked, and I made chicken penne pesto using fresh basil from my garden. It's really great drunk food.
We woke up today around noon, watched Clueless while we got high, went to grab some crepes and then walked around the museum, just basically goofing off. It was a VERY nice day! I miss my visitors already.
We hit the Pavillion at Mt. Adams, where we proceeded to take shots. Tequila (my idea...not the best I've ever had), red headed sluts, petron, one after another. Rounds and rounds were consumed. I was already dehydrated. For whatever reason, I was also just in the mood to be a bitch. I'm pretty sure its the dance club atmosphere. I was fine when we were sitting outside, making fun of people, doing impressions, telling stories...it was when we entered a crowded room of double-douches that I became really bitchy.
First off, I hope I never ever meet a love interest in a dance club. I don't have the personality for it. Bars are way better for actual socialization if you're going out for that. Stupid clubs: you bounce around, (some people) try to look hot (?), can't hear anything and yell the entire time. It's stressful, really. The same drunk girl dug her 4 inch stripper heels into my foot several times, and I was about 5 seconds away from really going off. If we hadn't been swarmed by short guys (we're talking 5'6"ish...not even my height. they looked 16) then I would have been very unladylike in my confrontation with her.
If you really want to have fun at a dance club, just dance with other chicks (or rap to Lil Troy with Mikey in a room full of black people). Most men have no rhythm. They want to put their dirty hands on your body. Girls don't do this. In groups, we make up silly dances and laugh and have a far better time. However, when women do this, it only draws more d-bags near. When this happens, I have identified a number of escape routes to take:
The bathroom (a classic...but somehow the megacreeps know to wait for you, so you actually have to hide or plan a new route to your destination)
The focused groove (ignore the guy completely and focus intensely on anything but the guy who is trying to dance with you; usually this is a good girl-friend who you were trying to dance with in the first place)
The gratitude (dance for only a minute, then stop completely, smile, and say "Thanks!" then give a little wave and walk off. Saying "thank you" confirms the finality of the situation)
Club social dynamic is hysterically retarded. Like a middle school dance, a guy will walk up to a chick, introduce himself within a couple songs, and say nothing thereafter. This somehow gives him the right to rub his boner on whoever. As I mentioned before, I was kinda put-out by the atmosphere and all the losers trying to dance with us (a good size group of women always get creepo attention) so I didn't afford anyone the courtesy of even a passive cop-out listed above.
A guy came up to me, started dancing and said, "Hey, My name's David."
My response:
"Hey. I don't care." I turned around completely. Getting out of my personal space was the only way this guy was going to improve my night. I wanted to be with my friends! Mikey is usually the douche deterrent, since most of the time people assume he's my boyfriend. However, he was spitting game and had no time to play watchdog.
So I ended up doing some dancing. I did do half a song's worth of African dancing with a French-African named Jean-Roucher. I learned a step or 5 at the dance clubs when I was in France, and he was shocked that a white girl in the midwest had any clue. Also, as usual, I managed to practice my french during the early morning hours. Usually, I only speak french with my cab driver Mohammed, so it was actually cool to have a conversation with a different dialect. It was short though since the music was far too loud for talking.
Even though there were megadouches everywhere and some drunk girl made me mad for a minute, we still had a blast. After the bars closed, we all stayed at my place, smoked, and I made chicken penne pesto using fresh basil from my garden. It's really great drunk food.
We woke up today around noon, watched Clueless while we got high, went to grab some crepes and then walked around the museum, just basically goofing off. It was a VERY nice day! I miss my visitors already.
Saturday, July 11, 2009
axe wounds, water skiing, great friends
This weekend, my partner in crime and her roommate from San Francisco came to visit. What a treat! Other than the fact that I'm exhausted right now. She left a while ago, and I've shamelessly bummed around since. I did a few productive things, like worked out and finished writing some letters, etc. but I've been stoned all day.
Can I just say that it's been really refreshing to hang out with my female friends? The past two weekends I've been able to spend with best friends from college, and it's been an absolute blast! The roomie, Stella and now Cali Ali have visited and we've really had a great time. I've written about this before, but it really kinda sucks making the adjustment from being in the middle of a group of 80+ females to moving into your own place and into a stupid grad school social circle that's tiny, distant and sometimes a little cold for my taste. Bonding with women is so much harder than before, because you're not forced into it by circumstances (i.e. living in dorms, rush, service projects). Additionally, at this point you've had so many friendships that you know what to look for in friends, as far as their personality types and value systems. I'm picky, I guess, in the kinda chicks I actually call friends. I really only have a couple good girl-friends here in the city.
My social group now, as a young professional, is mostly male, just because it's been easier. Like me, Mikey moved up here after undergrad, so we just kept kickin' it, then when trues came up that also resumed. Guys are typically easier to meet and way easier to weed out. You can tell if guys stretch the truth, their bad habits are obvious, and if they're annoying its usually right from the get-go. It's a little harder to decipher females in this respect. Females do a much better job at masking bad qualities. One chick I went to undergrad with was a compulsive liar. She was nuts. Yet, I didn't know until we were friends for a year and a half. She lied about all kinds of things, and did really shitty things to people. It went on for months before anyone knew. Months of my life I can't get back. Sucky suck suck. I'm glad I'm not gay, or a dude. I wouldn't want to bother with most women.
Not that men are a whole lot better, just a bit more transparent, perhaps. It's hard to find chicks who like to do the things I like to do. More guys smoke pot than girls, unfortunately. I like athletics and I'm active. I do things outdoors, like camp, climb and kayak. Not many females dig this stuff. Other than my BEST friends, which is why they are the BEST! But, they are also in different parts of the world. Because of my interests, I end up at a lot of sausage parties. Fun, but I was so happy to see my girl-friends for a change!
Last weekend, my ol' roomie came to visit.
The next day, I took a camping trip down to Laurel Lake. Stella and I smoked a ton of dope, listened to mad musique francaise, and camped with Tocaya II and her beau who came along. She (drunkenly) decided to chop some wood with a hatchet, and ended up in the ER. She put a nice little gash in her hand with an axe, in between her index finger and thumb. You could see all the stuff that happens under the skin on your hand. It reminded me of an uncooked pork chop, and I watched them put the stitches in it with amazement. When the doc (who apparently knew my mother, thank you HIPA) finished, he wrote her a prescription and sent us on our way. We were in an ER in southeastern Kentucky, and as we walked out the door she looks at her scripts, then looks at me and shouts, "PAIN PILLS!" Like, really enthusiastically (she woulda high-fived me if her hand was working) I wonder how many people every day react the same way at this country hospital?
On the way home we smoked hella weed and listened to Mike Posner's "Smoke and Drive". TIIIIGHT. Currently, my fav smoke song. (He's playing in Chicago on July 17th) We laughed about how Stella had an "Axe Wound". silly silly silly girls
This weekend was spent at the lake with Ali and Em. Mikey took us out on his boat, a crew of 8 of us, and we swam, cruised around the lake, smoked and ate food. We got pretty stellar tans, too. Weather was gorgeous and the water was warm. I defiantly did some water skiing, which is something that, despite growing up on the lake, I had never done. It took 4 tries for me to get up on the skis, then I got some coaching from Mikey and went for a hot minute. It was getting ready to storm and I was waterlogged and pretty high, so I stopped. BUT I am definitely going back for more practice! I can see how addictive water skiing can be.
Can I just say that it's been really refreshing to hang out with my female friends? The past two weekends I've been able to spend with best friends from college, and it's been an absolute blast! The roomie, Stella and now Cali Ali have visited and we've really had a great time. I've written about this before, but it really kinda sucks making the adjustment from being in the middle of a group of 80+ females to moving into your own place and into a stupid grad school social circle that's tiny, distant and sometimes a little cold for my taste. Bonding with women is so much harder than before, because you're not forced into it by circumstances (i.e. living in dorms, rush, service projects). Additionally, at this point you've had so many friendships that you know what to look for in friends, as far as their personality types and value systems. I'm picky, I guess, in the kinda chicks I actually call friends. I really only have a couple good girl-friends here in the city.
My social group now, as a young professional, is mostly male, just because it's been easier. Like me, Mikey moved up here after undergrad, so we just kept kickin' it, then when trues came up that also resumed. Guys are typically easier to meet and way easier to weed out. You can tell if guys stretch the truth, their bad habits are obvious, and if they're annoying its usually right from the get-go. It's a little harder to decipher females in this respect. Females do a much better job at masking bad qualities. One chick I went to undergrad with was a compulsive liar. She was nuts. Yet, I didn't know until we were friends for a year and a half. She lied about all kinds of things, and did really shitty things to people. It went on for months before anyone knew. Months of my life I can't get back. Sucky suck suck. I'm glad I'm not gay, or a dude. I wouldn't want to bother with most women.
Not that men are a whole lot better, just a bit more transparent, perhaps. It's hard to find chicks who like to do the things I like to do. More guys smoke pot than girls, unfortunately. I like athletics and I'm active. I do things outdoors, like camp, climb and kayak. Not many females dig this stuff. Other than my BEST friends, which is why they are the BEST! But, they are also in different parts of the world. Because of my interests, I end up at a lot of sausage parties. Fun, but I was so happy to see my girl-friends for a change!
Last weekend, my ol' roomie came to visit.
The next day, I took a camping trip down to Laurel Lake. Stella and I smoked a ton of dope, listened to mad musique francaise, and camped with Tocaya II and her beau who came along. She (drunkenly) decided to chop some wood with a hatchet, and ended up in the ER. She put a nice little gash in her hand with an axe, in between her index finger and thumb. You could see all the stuff that happens under the skin on your hand. It reminded me of an uncooked pork chop, and I watched them put the stitches in it with amazement. When the doc (who apparently knew my mother, thank you HIPA) finished, he wrote her a prescription and sent us on our way. We were in an ER in southeastern Kentucky, and as we walked out the door she looks at her scripts, then looks at me and shouts, "PAIN PILLS!" Like, really enthusiastically (she woulda high-fived me if her hand was working) I wonder how many people every day react the same way at this country hospital?
On the way home we smoked hella weed and listened to Mike Posner's "Smoke and Drive". TIIIIGHT. Currently, my fav smoke song. (He's playing in Chicago on July 17th) We laughed about how Stella had an "Axe Wound". silly silly silly girls
This weekend was spent at the lake with Ali and Em. Mikey took us out on his boat, a crew of 8 of us, and we swam, cruised around the lake, smoked and ate food. We got pretty stellar tans, too. Weather was gorgeous and the water was warm. I defiantly did some water skiing, which is something that, despite growing up on the lake, I had never done. It took 4 tries for me to get up on the skis, then I got some coaching from Mikey and went for a hot minute. It was getting ready to storm and I was waterlogged and pretty high, so I stopped. BUT I am definitely going back for more practice! I can see how addictive water skiing can be.
Friday, July 10, 2009
See trouble comin'
Nothing I really love more than a visit from a great friend! I've been so lucky lately to have seen some good ones!
Headin' to the lake, can only imagine the kind of stories I will have afterwards. I hope I barely survive.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
75 cent beers
I've got some posts to stick on here. Long overdue stuffs. Before I forget (as I often do), Mikey has once again supplied me with quotable material
(drunk text) "Thank you for being you. We will drink and smole til dawn well not til dawn but i git nothin but time."
That is the result of 75 cent drafts night at Average Joes. I am so excited to do some mad crazy SMOLING!
I'm heading there in a few minutes, even though it's late. I meant to go earlier, but I picked up my guitar for the first time in years (literally, since sophomore year of college or something like that) just to play chords and goof around. I forgot how fun it is to get high and play guitar! 4.5 hours later I realize it's time to go to the bar...
I assure you I have been very well-behaved lately. I started my own business and have been working on that 24/7, so I've cut down the ganja consumption and been pretty focused. Tonight, however, I stopped working at 5:30, like normal people, went to eat with girlfriends, then got high and played guitar pretty much all night. When was the last time you got high and played guitar? I think you should do it again sometime soon. You'll realize what you were missing!
(drunk text) "Thank you for being you. We will drink and smole til dawn well not til dawn but i git nothin but time."
That is the result of 75 cent drafts night at Average Joes. I am so excited to do some mad crazy SMOLING!
I'm heading there in a few minutes, even though it's late. I meant to go earlier, but I picked up my guitar for the first time in years (literally, since sophomore year of college or something like that) just to play chords and goof around. I forgot how fun it is to get high and play guitar! 4.5 hours later I realize it's time to go to the bar...
I assure you I have been very well-behaved lately. I started my own business and have been working on that 24/7, so I've cut down the ganja consumption and been pretty focused. Tonight, however, I stopped working at 5:30, like normal people, went to eat with girlfriends, then got high and played guitar pretty much all night. When was the last time you got high and played guitar? I think you should do it again sometime soon. You'll realize what you were missing!
babies on skates!!
nothing gets to me quite like baby humor! I laughed myself to death watching this! the little dude weaving in and out of water bottles is tight.
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Gangsta Elmo
I honestly cannot believe how sadistic these tweenage boys are (and how much they know and have seen!) Too many rated R movies, nice livestrong braclet and little league t-shirt:
MJ in butter? Iowa State Fair gives in...
The Iowa State Fair, listed among the "Top 100 Things to do before you Die" is now boasting of their recently commissioned addition to the festivities: a monumental sculpture of Michael Jackson in the moonwalk pose, made completely from butter.
I am so offended that I have nothing to say at this point. Likely, I will log on later and complain, but my shock at just reading about this is clouding my ability to formulate opinions at this point.
Read the whole article here.
I am so offended that I have nothing to say at this point. Likely, I will log on later and complain, but my shock at just reading about this is clouding my ability to formulate opinions at this point.
Read the whole article here.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
being selfish is being both virtuous and loving: on another Ayn Rand soapbox
“In the name of the best within you, do not sacrifice this world to those who are its worst. In the name of the values that keep you alive, do not let your vision of man be distorted by the ugly, the cowardly, the mindless in those who have never achieved his title. Do not lose your knowledge that man's proper estate is an upright posture, an intransigent mind and a step that travels unlimited roads. Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle. The world you desired can be won, it exists, it is real, it is possible, it's yours."
Ayn Rand is a genius, in my opinion. If I could meet one person, living or dead, she would be my #1 pick. If you haven't read The Virtue of Selfishness, you should before the summer is over. You learn a lot about a very different way to look at the world, whether you agree or disagree.
She has a very unique philosophy about the individual as a hero, and how the hero loves. It's woven into all of her work, and even her interviews that I posted a while back discuss her philosophy of love. I agree with her 100% that we don't need to be "sacrificial animals," loving others only because we are told to. Loving for others' benefit is not gratifying, and not your best. You owe yourself your best.
“Love is an expression and assertion of self-esteem, a response to one's own values in the person of another. One gains a profoundly personal, selfish joy from the mere existence of the person one loves. It is one's own personal, selfish happiness that one seeks, earns, and derives from love.”
Why not love ourselves enough to love others who have the same self-esteem? We should love and respect others for their virtues and character that they've consciously chosen and developed. Giving love freely is for the birds. No one can make you love anything. Ever. You are in control of what you choose to love. We throw the word "love" around like a frisbee on a college campus. I too am guilty of using it too frequently in my daily language.
I'm going to step back and think about what I really see my own virtues in before I say, "I love it!" Love means a lot more than we ever recognize when we blab to our friends, and I think that I will live a more fulfilling life if I am more conscious of this.
“Love is the expression of one's values, the greatest reward you can earn for the moral qualities you have achieved in your character and person, the emotional price paid by one man for the joy he receives from the virtues of another.”
I hope you find the virtues in those around you that trigger your admiration and love for the right reason: these virtues are much like your own.
*When I say "We" I don't mean for my words to be prescriptive to you as a reader. My ferret is sitting right here, so this is more of a published monologue with a Maximus audience. One Love.
Ayn Rand is a genius, in my opinion. If I could meet one person, living or dead, she would be my #1 pick. If you haven't read The Virtue of Selfishness, you should before the summer is over. You learn a lot about a very different way to look at the world, whether you agree or disagree.
She has a very unique philosophy about the individual as a hero, and how the hero loves. It's woven into all of her work, and even her interviews that I posted a while back discuss her philosophy of love. I agree with her 100% that we don't need to be "sacrificial animals," loving others only because we are told to. Loving for others' benefit is not gratifying, and not your best. You owe yourself your best.
“Love is an expression and assertion of self-esteem, a response to one's own values in the person of another. One gains a profoundly personal, selfish joy from the mere existence of the person one loves. It is one's own personal, selfish happiness that one seeks, earns, and derives from love.”
Why not love ourselves enough to love others who have the same self-esteem? We should love and respect others for their virtues and character that they've consciously chosen and developed. Giving love freely is for the birds. No one can make you love anything. Ever. You are in control of what you choose to love. We throw the word "love" around like a frisbee on a college campus. I too am guilty of using it too frequently in my daily language.
I'm going to step back and think about what I really see my own virtues in before I say, "I love it!" Love means a lot more than we ever recognize when we blab to our friends, and I think that I will live a more fulfilling life if I am more conscious of this.
“Love is the expression of one's values, the greatest reward you can earn for the moral qualities you have achieved in your character and person, the emotional price paid by one man for the joy he receives from the virtues of another.”
I hope you find the virtues in those around you that trigger your admiration and love for the right reason: these virtues are much like your own.
*When I say "We" I don't mean for my words to be prescriptive to you as a reader. My ferret is sitting right here, so this is more of a published monologue with a Maximus audience. One Love.
The Game Disappoints, gives into MJ Hype & Hypocrisy
So one of my favorite rappers, The Game, has failed me. (Remember just a month ago I was hyping him on this blog?!) Sold out to the Jackson hype surrounding MJ's death. Didn't everyone have a bad taste in their mouth for MJ when he was accused of doing nasty things to little boys? The public has practically canonized him, as flowers, icons, relics and candlelight vigils fill every news station and blog. I am sick of all this hype. He lived as a recluse because of the way he was perceived by the public, can we not just give him a humble, honorable passage?
The Game had to get involved by getting ho' slapper Chris Brown to collaborate on a Michael Jackson tribute song. What's worse is the video. Here are the cliffnotes: The video shows a bunch of the Michael-worshipping, The Game taking a bath surrounded by candles with his clothes on, recording studio shots, and TATTOO studio shots. YES, THE GAME HAS A NEW TATTOO OF FUCKING MICHAEL JACKSON ON HIS ARM. You can see it in stages in this sucky video for this sucky song. Tattoo is at 2:15, 2:26, 3:46, and 4:25 (completed).
So is he really upset about Michael, or did he just want a good excuse to get new ink and flaunt it for attention? Fuck all this noise. I'm just going to listen to "Bang Along" and forget The Game ever did this.
The Game had to get involved by getting ho' slapper Chris Brown to collaborate on a Michael Jackson tribute song. What's worse is the video. Here are the cliffnotes: The video shows a bunch of the Michael-worshipping, The Game taking a bath surrounded by candles with his clothes on, recording studio shots, and TATTOO studio shots. YES, THE GAME HAS A NEW TATTOO OF FUCKING MICHAEL JACKSON ON HIS ARM. You can see it in stages in this sucky video for this sucky song. Tattoo is at 2:15, 2:26, 3:46, and 4:25 (completed).
So is he really upset about Michael, or did he just want a good excuse to get new ink and flaunt it for attention? Fuck all this noise. I'm just going to listen to "Bang Along" and forget The Game ever did this.
HOLLACAUST: T Pain and the "Big Ass Chain"
What's made of 197 karats, cost $410,000 and weighs ten pounds?
T Pain's "Big Ass Chain" that he bought in June. I can't believe I didn't see this sooner (thanks Roomie, for the ref on this!).
Now, I am officially following T Pain on Twitter just to read the ridiculous shit he posts, such as:
"Dudes and girls, I just wanna give a quick preview of the last chain you'll ever like. I'm shuttin' it down."
AND (also in reference to the chain):
"Very very real I don't know what fake feel like. $410,000. Hola señor recession proof."
T Pain's "Big Ass Chain" that he bought in June. I can't believe I didn't see this sooner (thanks Roomie, for the ref on this!).
Now, I am officially following T Pain on Twitter just to read the ridiculous shit he posts, such as:
"Dudes and girls, I just wanna give a quick preview of the last chain you'll ever like. I'm shuttin' it down."
AND (also in reference to the chain):
"Very very real I don't know what fake feel like. $410,000. Hola señor recession proof."
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Today I woke up from never sleeping a wink, on a Beatles kick again...
There's nothing you can do that can't be done.
Nothing you can sing that can't be sung.
Nothing you can say but you can learn how to play the game
It's easy.
There's nothing you can make that can't be made.
No one you can save that can't be saved.
Nothing you can do but you can learn how to be you in time
It's easy.
All you need is love.
[i took this photo at the lennon memorial, strawberry fields, central park, NYC 2008]
Guess who's comin' to visit? BALLA
Boy am I lucky to have some fabulous guests coming up this week! See the photomontage below for a visual rendering of my life from June 30-July 5. Ballasaurus Rex!
la-la-la-la-life goes on...
People sure do make some fun clips these days. I would really like some fun clip building skills. Maybe in my next life...
Friday, June 26, 2009
fertile crescent to washington DC: law, art, and gender
This is a really cool blog post about art, politics and women by a writer for the times.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
SICK SICK SICK FUCKIN AWESOME
Johnny Depp as the Mad Hatter in Tim Burton's Alice and Wonderland!!!!! yes yes yes yes yes yes yes
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Cincinnati's own white Reggae artist: Elementree
Listen to his newest song"Thank You Jah" here.
From the 'Nati. Authenticity?...questionable. Talented?...you could certainly justify that claim.
Rastafari is Love
“…Rastafari is love. For Rasta sort of bring a barrage of love, a triumph of love, a triumph of happiness. For when Rastaman really beat his drum and really sing his Niyabinghi tune, your heart could be hard like iron, it will melt, you understand.”
-Rastaman S. Watson, in conversation with Alja Naliwaiko
Metta + Max
May all beings be happy, content and fulfilled.
May all beings be healed and whole.
May all have whatever they want and need.
May all be protected from harm, and free from fear.
May all beings enjoy inner peace and ease.
May all be awakened, liberated and free.
May there be peace in this world, and throughout the entire universe.
(Image: Peter Max, Better World III, 1999, acrylic over lithograph)
On being optimistic under not-so-fun circumstances: Max has Adrenal Disease
On friday, I took Maximus (pictured on the right, curled up in one of my Centre College fleeces on my sheepskin rug) to the vet, as I noticed some of his tail-hair getting thin. The verdict: Max has adrenal disease. It could lead to cancer, but I caught it early enough that he can be treated with hormone therapy for now, then we can switch to ferret chemotherapy if it gets worse. He's not in pain, but he will live a shorter ferret life and lose the hair on his body with the exception of his face and the tip of his tail. He gets a shot once a month (which is very very painful, judging from the look on Max's face after they stuck it right into his tiny shoulder bone), and this should keep his adrenal gland from overproducing hormones that could cause health problems.
When the vet explained everything to me, I guess I was in shock, and just trying to digest the information. I stayed pretty collected, until I got into the car, where I balled my eyes out. Couldn't go back to work, as my eyes were nearly swollen shut. Yeah, it was sucky. However, I've come to terms with everything: Max is being treated, he still plays and eats, and he's not in pain. I'm trying to keep a good sense of humor about it, since there is a chance that he may lose his beautiful fur and end up looking like a splotchy naked mole weasel. ('Rat' is derogatory to Max)
My next plan of action goes something like this:
1. Patent one of those rubber awareness bracelets in a color that hasn't already been snatched.
2. Buy some awesome ferret treats and spoil my little furry dude.
3. Continue pushing Kentucky to legalize marijuana, so Max can get a medical card. I'll strap him in his little red harness and we'll go for a leisurely little walk to the compassion center, where we can pick up his Rx.
Regardless of the bad news I got, the vet also gave Maximus some meaningful compliments:
He has excellent teeth for a ferret (even though he has a tiny gap between his two front bottom teeth...which are too small for braces)
He has beautiful fur.
He is a happy ferret with a friendly demeanor.
According to Dr. Dalhaussen, Maximus is very well-behaved, and withstood a very painful shot without whining, biting, or any type of aggressive reaction common to other ferrets getting the same shot. No lie, I was really proud of him for being such a trooper. I think I cried and whined enough for both of us!
All is not lost, just new challenges ahead. One love.
When the vet explained everything to me, I guess I was in shock, and just trying to digest the information. I stayed pretty collected, until I got into the car, where I balled my eyes out. Couldn't go back to work, as my eyes were nearly swollen shut. Yeah, it was sucky. However, I've come to terms with everything: Max is being treated, he still plays and eats, and he's not in pain. I'm trying to keep a good sense of humor about it, since there is a chance that he may lose his beautiful fur and end up looking like a splotchy naked mole weasel. ('Rat' is derogatory to Max)
My next plan of action goes something like this:
1. Patent one of those rubber awareness bracelets in a color that hasn't already been snatched.
2. Buy some awesome ferret treats and spoil my little furry dude.
3. Continue pushing Kentucky to legalize marijuana, so Max can get a medical card. I'll strap him in his little red harness and we'll go for a leisurely little walk to the compassion center, where we can pick up his Rx.
Regardless of the bad news I got, the vet also gave Maximus some meaningful compliments:
He has excellent teeth for a ferret (even though he has a tiny gap between his two front bottom teeth...which are too small for braces)
He has beautiful fur.
He is a happy ferret with a friendly demeanor.
According to Dr. Dalhaussen, Maximus is very well-behaved, and withstood a very painful shot without whining, biting, or any type of aggressive reaction common to other ferrets getting the same shot. No lie, I was really proud of him for being such a trooper. I think I cried and whined enough for both of us!
All is not lost, just new challenges ahead. One love.
Monday, June 22, 2009
Tim, Eric, Zach G. and Absolut Vodka
My love for Tim and Eric knows no bounds, and you add Zachy G. in the mix...might have to change my panties. I really can't stop laughing at the beehive... Apparently Absolut paid them to do this for their website (this information comes from Eric Wareheim's YouTube page) Genius marketing. I'm going out with friends tonight, and I'm dyin' to order a cape codder... with Absolute!
Part I:
Part II:
There's just something about funny fat guys...so damn loveable!!!!
Part I:
Part II:
There's just something about funny fat guys...so damn loveable!!!!
10 things I hate about commandments
Great casting decision on the burning bush. This video gave me a pretty good laugh, as I thoroughly love bible mockery and humor:
Juan rules!
Juan rules!
Did you shave your V for vagina? Two of my heros chat "Between Two Ferns"
What was it like working with Chewbacca?
It would be so funny if he drove a Miata.
(I now have a mega huge crush on Zach Galifianakis.)
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Don't laugh during sex: my most recent sexploit
Guess who got laid for the first time in months?!?! It was awkward, only because I'm an effing drunk idiot sometimes. My sober mentality doesn't really contribute to any sort of romantic success, either. I laughed during sex, which automatically offends/confuses your partner.
I went out in a skirt, and my inner-voice asked me as I was getting ready, "Should you shave your legs? Could you wear cuter panties?" and I might as well have replied, "No and fuck off," because my legs felt like sandpaper and my panties had purple peace signs and smily faces all over them. I can't even identify any reason for owning these undies, nor can I remember obtaining them. They were in my clean drawer and I put them on. Beyond that who knows.
A specific memory of mine went something like, "You haven't done anything hot with a guy in a long time. There's not even a prospect in sight. Just hurry up and get ready so you can get drunk at this baseball game." And get drunk I did. Drunk enough to sleep with a classmate several hours later. A hot class mate.
So the guy: another art geek, but a cute one. When clothes start peeling off, I definitely noticed that he's got pretty killer abs, and to top it off, he has a big dick. This is when I started to think about things that made me laugh during sex.
Nothing at all had to do with him. He's pretty seriously attractive, in many ways. I was actually cracking up at myself, what a joker I am. It's like the sex fairy set me up or something. I'm getting naked with a cute, ripped guy who has a big dick, and what do I have to offer? Sandpaper legs and a pussy covered in peace signs and smilies?!?! I was just pretty embarrassed, and what else do ya do when you are completely aware that you don't have it together?
It was like going to your first corporate meeting as a board member, and in lieu of a leather-bound folio you show up with a lisa frank trapper keeper. What a joke.
I went out in a skirt, and my inner-voice asked me as I was getting ready, "Should you shave your legs? Could you wear cuter panties?" and I might as well have replied, "No and fuck off," because my legs felt like sandpaper and my panties had purple peace signs and smily faces all over them. I can't even identify any reason for owning these undies, nor can I remember obtaining them. They were in my clean drawer and I put them on. Beyond that who knows.
A specific memory of mine went something like, "You haven't done anything hot with a guy in a long time. There's not even a prospect in sight. Just hurry up and get ready so you can get drunk at this baseball game." And get drunk I did. Drunk enough to sleep with a classmate several hours later. A hot class mate.
So the guy: another art geek, but a cute one. When clothes start peeling off, I definitely noticed that he's got pretty killer abs, and to top it off, he has a big dick. This is when I started to think about things that made me laugh during sex.
Nothing at all had to do with him. He's pretty seriously attractive, in many ways. I was actually cracking up at myself, what a joker I am. It's like the sex fairy set me up or something. I'm getting naked with a cute, ripped guy who has a big dick, and what do I have to offer? Sandpaper legs and a pussy covered in peace signs and smilies?!?! I was just pretty embarrassed, and what else do ya do when you are completely aware that you don't have it together?
It was like going to your first corporate meeting as a board member, and in lieu of a leather-bound folio you show up with a lisa frank trapper keeper. What a joke.
Monday, June 15, 2009
Will F. and the BAT FIGHT!
I'm kinda glad someone beat the shit out of Will F. Is that so bad of me?
90s rap trivia
Okay, answer this:
Who was the only group in all of music history to collaborate with 2Pac, Easy-E, Big Pun, and the Notorious B.I.G., while they were all ALIVE?
scroll for the answer
I
I
I
V
Bone Thugs-N-Harmony
Who was the only group in all of music history to collaborate with 2Pac, Easy-E, Big Pun, and the Notorious B.I.G., while they were all ALIVE?
scroll for the answer
I
I
I
V
Bone Thugs-N-Harmony
Sunday, June 14, 2009
FINALLY! We've admitted our ignorance
THIS ARTICLE that was just published in the New York Times speaks so much truth about our failing drug policies.
I don't know about you, but I'm tired of our country declaring war on the intangible: terror, drugs, and yes, drugs are intangible when used in this way. They become associated with a narrowly-conceived ideology, so the "things" drugs are really just representative of the IDEA of drugs - the WRONG idea. One of the many reasons a "War on Drugs" was a disaster from the beginning.
For fun, I've put together a list of other stupid things against which the United States would wage war, if our former President George W. Bush were still in office:
"I wont all y'all to know that Me and my staff have a strategery for winning this war on..."
Hurricanes
Reading
Green
Confusion
the sound of nails on a chalk board
Wildfires
anti-Jesusers
Relaxation
dreams that seem so real that you think they happened but they were actually just dreams
contagious yawning
thrifting
burnt muffins
deserts
Isn't it nice that people are beginning to come to their senses?
If you are a young, intelligent, hard-working stoner, please tell the people around you who recognize your character that you also smoke marijuana, and it has never affected the person you are, the work that you do or the life that you lead. The more people who realize that they (no matter how free-thinking they might be) have become victim to conservative propaganda, the closer America comes to making worthwhile progress.
I don't know about you, but I'm tired of our country declaring war on the intangible: terror, drugs, and yes, drugs are intangible when used in this way. They become associated with a narrowly-conceived ideology, so the "things" drugs are really just representative of the IDEA of drugs - the WRONG idea. One of the many reasons a "War on Drugs" was a disaster from the beginning.
For fun, I've put together a list of other stupid things against which the United States would wage war, if our former President George W. Bush were still in office:
"I wont all y'all to know that Me and my staff have a strategery for winning this war on..."
Hurricanes
Reading
Green
Confusion
the sound of nails on a chalk board
Wildfires
anti-Jesusers
Relaxation
dreams that seem so real that you think they happened but they were actually just dreams
contagious yawning
thrifting
burnt muffins
deserts
Isn't it nice that people are beginning to come to their senses?
If you are a young, intelligent, hard-working stoner, please tell the people around you who recognize your character that you also smoke marijuana, and it has never affected the person you are, the work that you do or the life that you lead. The more people who realize that they (no matter how free-thinking they might be) have become victim to conservative propaganda, the closer America comes to making worthwhile progress.
words, thoughts, feelings, work
Develop a generous nature
in order that you may become
a King of kings.
If you give,
the wealth of the whole world is yours.
This is the law of nature.
Therefore give, give, give.
You make a living by what you earn,
but you make a life by what you give.
Always give, give, give.
This is the secret of abundance
and divine life.
This is the way of God.
-spoken in yoga by Swami Sivanada
In the past two weeks, I have appraised over 130 works on paper by Peter Max from a private art collection. During this time I've also managed to graduate and start a new chapter in my life. A very weird feeling, after 19 consecutive years of school; a feeling that certainly makes you think a lot...
did overdramatized music videos even make sense in the 80s?
So often we giggle at the ever-popular elements of this 80s cultural revival that's taking place, because shit that was normal in the 80s seems so strange to us out of its context. However, some things, even contextualized in the 1980s, are still just fuckin' weird. Bonnie Tyler's "Total Eclipse of the Heart" video is one of those things. The video parody quickly brings this to light:
I hope this made you laugh!
I hope this made you laugh!
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Happy Birthday Emily!!!!
Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!
I hope your birthday is full of magical things, such as Obama's unicorn, frolicking with forest creatures, sweet melodies, et. al. Much Love!
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Dr. Dreher knows best
The most famous study done on marijuana use during pregnancy. Great method, scope of data, and just an all-around thorough research project. VERY interesting outcomes!
Don't ever believe what you read on government websites, or websites of health organizations that get government funding. Politicians and physicians are completely different.
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Michael Phelps and Kellogs for stoners
this is old, but still funny. I think he started training again just a couple weeks ago? I could be wrong. oh well. just watch the F%*!@$N' clip!
Saturday, June 6, 2009
Peaches New Mini-Doc
In this new mini documentary from Peaches' website, she discusses the role of gendering in politics, and what she does through her music to break this down, one beat at a time, without ever forgetting how to rock out. This stoner, women's liberator, masturbator-rockstar is one bad ass bitch! Watch the video HERE.
Her new album came out at the beginning of May, and it's the shit. Check out Serpentine, I Feel Cream, and Billionaire.
She plays in Atlanta on June 15th, and I'm about to put together a road trip because seeing her live would be one helluva show!
This is a very accurate depiction of my desktop right now...
From phdcomics.com a great site for mega-nerds in grad school!
Thursday, June 4, 2009
A rasta after smoking 25 joints in a day
Would my laugh be that annoying if I smoked 25 joints in a single day? Probably. I am surprised he can talk. Honestly, I'm just amazed. 25 j's in a day: I feel like that needs to be public record or something.
I effin' love the rastas (even though they don't care for whiteys or women too terribly much)
His song also rocks, and I plan on learning it and singing it every time I light up a j.
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Recognize the medicinal value of marijuana!
Physicians in California released this list of conditions for which medicinal marijuana is an effective treatment:
(1) AIDS wasting syndrome
(2) arthritis, osteo- and rheumatoid
(3) asthma (while not burning cannabis)
(4) Crohn’s disease/inflammatory bowel disease
(5) depression
(6) mental illness--schizophrenia (pro and con articles have been reported)
(7) degenerative neural diseases
(8) eating disorders/anorexia
(9) epilepsy/seizures
(10) glaucoma
(11) intractable breathlessness
(12) migraine
(13) multiple sclerosis
(14) nausea and vomiting
(15) obstetric problems (dysmenorrheal, morning sickness, uterine bleeding, and antimiscarriage)
(16) pain, of all types
(17) phantom limb pain
(18) tumors ( blockade of a carcinogenesis enzyme)
(19) withdrawal symptoms of alcoholism, morphinism, cocaine addiction, chloral hydrate addiction, etc. (and probably tobacco addiction).
The biggest triumph on this list: obstetric problems. I have read articles about studies done on pregnant jamaican women who regularly used marijuana that revealed no birth defects in their children. However, I had no clue that it was actually so beneficial for expecting mothers! Ganja can keep you from having a miscarriage! What a relief for women. The website mothering.com even published an article on it!
I feel a whole lot better about eventually getting pregnant.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
She is a piece of shit
I really don't like saying nasty things about people, and I love to love life, but this person sucks in all ways. She goes to Big Butter Jesus Church. Also a joke. Just looking out for you, in case you ever see her. God forbid you're gay and bump into her, she might get confused and offended, but more likely hot and bothered....
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
This is the reason I am graduating on time
This girl is the shit. From typing title pages to converting my word docs into PDFs, she helped me with everything. Why? Because that's what badasses do.
Monday, May 25, 2009
Happy Birthday, Daddio
It was my dad's birthday yesterday, and he came up this evening to celebrate. I am horribly freaking sick right now, yet still managed to craft some cupcakes...into the shape of a REVOLVER!
I mean, my pops is a gun-loving Republican, what I am supposed to do? I wonder who else in the world turns cupcakes into guns. Everything is 100% edible.
Sunday, May 24, 2009
The beginning of a new bender, or the night I saw the Features and got put on Craigslist
As I sit here, feverish from what I believe to be alcohol poisoning, I think fondly of the past three days of debauchery that justify this debilitating physical condition. Each night will be put into separate posts, beginning with Thursday.
Thursday night was the official celebration of passing my thesis defense! So, Mikey and I decided to drink A LOT and go listen to one of my favorite bands play. I lost track of how many times I've seen them live. MTV was filming "Making the Band" so we had to sign waivers and get our photos taken before we went into the Southgate House. Mikey and I may have gotten on TV, but we were too drunk to have known if we were filmed. This is a bad thing.
We did some tequila shots, pounded beers, and reserved our energy through the opening bands to expel when the Features went on. To my surprise, the first bands had a better crowd than the Features! I found this disturbing, so I took it upon myself to project as much energy and enthusiasm as a packed house. I kinda went nuts. No lie. I jumped around A LOT.
My actions were so pronounced that the lead singer of the band, Matt, addressed my behavior through the microphone: "Thank you all for coming out. i hope you're enjoying the show. I know SHE is." I called for an encore at the end of the show, and I was granted two requests: Idea of Growing Old and another from Exhibit A that I was too drunk to retain in my memory. I do remember how awesome they were though, and I was shakin' it all over the place.
This belligerence resulted in some guy that I talked to at the show posting for me on Craigslist's Missed Connections. I don't remember what I said really and definitely don't remember what he looks like, but Minnie texted me the night after the show and informed me that someone might have posted about me. Here is the initial post:
You kinda just chilled all night until The Features came on then you danced your ass off and I thought the guy with you was your boyfriend. You said later that he was only a friend. You even got them to play two extra songs (great choices, btw). You seemed like a really cool chick. Reply to this post and tell me what tshirt you were wearing so I know it's you.
This fuckin' blew my mind. Mikey was tryin to tell me that I didn't need to be surprised, because I owned the Southgate House for about an hour of my life. However, Missed Connections is hilarious and I never ever ever thought one of those posts would be about me! I always thought of them for entertainment purposes only. Wow. Okay, so I'm going to post the reply thread below so you can see how it all panned out:
I was definitely wearing a white tshirt with Warhol's Marilyn printed in pink on the front. I remember talking but I was a few tequila shots in.
I can't believe the crowd was so small! The Features rock, and I'm glad you liked my song choices. :-) So cool you found me on Missed Connections! (I got a text from one of my best girlfriends that read, "I think someone posted a missed connection for you from the Features show!!!" how fun!)
Wow. I have never ever posted a missed connections before but I must
admit that reading them is one of my guilty pleasures! haha
I actually had a Features tee on and I didn't expect you to remember
me with all the commotion going on (started by you mostly) ya know. I
just thought you were a pretty fun chick and obviously have a great
choice of music so I dropped a line to say hey.
There's an awesome band playing Tues @ Southgate btw... Roger Clyne
and The Peacemakers. Maybe I'll see you there and say hey if that's
okay?
Always love meeting new people and finding out about new music so stay
in touch if you can.
Have a good holiday.
Surprisingly, I am not creeped out by this dude (as one would expect to be, meeting someone on Craigslist). Should I be scared? What do I do next?!? Fuck me this is random.
After the show, Mikey and I went dancing at Arnie's, which was lame as usual but we were drunk enough to forget about it. If it's any gauge of my intoxication, Mikey had an entire joint rolled and ready and neither of us had the coordination to smoke. I fell asleep with a plate of half-eaten breaded shrimp sitting on my tits, cuddling with a bottle of vitamin water. The next day I went to get my hair done, and my stylist found cocktail sauce in my hair. To get to work on time, I had to go in the same clothes I went out in the night before. I'm one classy bitch, that's for sure.
Day 2 of the bender: Danville road trip to sing with Elderbeest.
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