Birth control? Really?

This post is not entertaining or inspirational; it's more or less a personal health monologue. If you don't have a vagina you should care but probably don't. Why? Because if you don't have a vagina you probably don't ever have to ask yourself, "Should I take birth control?" It's a tough question to answer.

It doesn't seem like it should be: take a pill every day (or whatever ring, patch, etc) and you can fuck all the time without getting knocked up. In theory, it sounds fabulous! However, you are actually putting synthetic hormones in your body.

Hormones control everything about you: what you love, hate, feel, basically how you live. Do you really want to put synthetic hormones in your body?

Birth control (i.e. the pills, patch, ring, shot) can make your weight fluctuate. I don't know about you, but if I ever feel fat, I'm not having sex. These synthetic hormones also kill your libido.

So, taking birth control could potentially numb you from feeling and put you into a state of existence in an asexual world plus fifteen pounds. Doesn't sound like you get laid much there. I don't ever want to be in this place.

Furthermore, people can't be trusted. Even the best guys have slept with girls that I would never sleep with if I was gay or a dude. This just means you should use condoms anyway. Who knows what's goin' around...

Aside from condoms (monogamous relationship) pull-out method is more effective than condoms when done properly. If you know when you're ovulating, and you use condoms during the 10 days around ovulation, and he pulls out the rest of the time, this is more reliable than birth control pills. Real talk.

Plus, who wants to take a pill every day? And really, will you remember to take it at the same time every day? I worked with two women, who are now two mommies, because they flaked out and forgot to take their birth control pills at the right time. Slip up once or twice in a month and you're ovulating then BAM! You're prego. I don't trust myself, nor do I want to, take a pill every single day. I'm not even getting laid right now! Take your pills elsewhere, Doc.

Yet another thing that men never have to stress about.