looking at David Hasselhoff hurts my feelings

Perhaps the only person I find more visually offensive that Mitt Romney is David Hasselhoff. Yes, I am honestly offended when I look at him, and I question not only the taste, but also the integrity of women who find him attractive. This really is a moral issue for me.

So, I've collected a small sampling of media capturing quintessential Hasselhoff moments so you too can understand the absurd character that is David Hasselhoff.

This photo was the first offense. This could be considered animal cruelty, and I have never felt so sorry for innocent, undeserving pug puppies in my 23 years on this earth.



As Juan pointed out to me last night, he might possibly be the worst singer in the world. You can listen to one of his "hits" by clicking here. The white suit doesn't do much for him, either. This is why I drink coke.

If I were going to celebrate the fall of Communism, David Hasselhoff would be the last person in the world I would invite (with the exception of Kant and Marx). He somehow manages to synthesize his unattractiveness, poor taste and lack of talent in this video of his performance on the Berlin Wall in '89. Even that jacket is too cool for David Hasselhoff.


Finally, we see David in his most shining moment: wasted, belligerent and rolling on the floor while eating and being taped. Priceless.