I laugh at retards. I relish the word "cunt". I even love racial humor and sexist jokes. I didn't start hating myself during 2g1cup until the vomiting part. What, might you ask offends me? I will tell you now.
DO NOT FUCK WITH MY MAXIMUS
Never. Just don't think about it. He is my baby. I have a web page named in his honor. Do not talk shit about him, around him or behind his back. Do not tease him in a mean way with his toys and treats. Do not under ANY circumstances EVER hurt him. The consequences will be gruesome. I cannot even type here what I would do to a person that hurt Max, for fear that it could be used against me in court.
What prompted this? Well, just last night I realized that very little bothers me, after being cussed out by a huge black dude, stood up for an appointment and then getting a fuckin' parking ticket. While these things certainly frightened, disappointed and annoyed me (respectively) I am pretty good about letting it roll off my back. UNTIL Max is brought into the picture. Then backwoods KY comes right out and shit gets red. That's all there is to it.
He's a tiny, friendly, lovable little weasel! He sleeps at the foot of my bed, gives ferret kisses, gets ready with me every morning, watches me fix my hair and even drinks some of my cereal milk. How could you even think of mistreating something this cute?! Undoubtedly, Maximus is my soft spot, and the point on which I take no crap.
1 comment:
dude, what the hell happened to max? i will kill whoever is to blame.
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